Tuesday, November 29, 2005

It Really Is Amazing.

I shit you not. For some reason I stared and stared at that page for hours last night. Or should I say this morning around 4am, when it became apparent that the whole sleeping thing wasn't going to happen? Poor, unsuspecting, Terence. You know, one of my CMS kids. He hated me on 7 hours of sleep...he must be dreaming a grisly death for me as he sleeps through his 3rd block English class right now. Hell, what do I care? As Will Barton would say, "Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke." (Hurry up and read When All The World Was Young, you jerkoffs.)

I don't know what it is about winter that makes me lonelier and hornier than other parts of the year. Then again, it does help explain my bad mood last December. But still, it just don't make sense to me. Yeah, I made mention of myself and sex. Did you see that coming? Bet ya didn't. Think back, as far as you possibly can. Now try to conjure up a memory of me talking casually about sex and myself when I wasn't joking. That's right. Pretty fuckin rare. (Doomcock.)

Awww, it's nice that you think different. You guys are so sweet, sometimes. But really, I can cop to it; I'm quite the prude. I've known for a long time. It's not my fault for having principals. It is, however, my fault for having totally unreasonable expectations of how other people should live up to them. That's not some sudden and profound realization, mind you. And no, Lunchie, this doesn't have anything to do with our conversation on the trip to Ridgevilletown. I had that little epiphany quite some time ago. But, it seems, only now I'm coming to actually accept it and deal with it. Holy shit, I may be growing up.

You know, I always wince a little whenever someone, like my dad, comments on how mature I am. I'm not mature, you fuckers. Listen to the way I talk...and write. I'm probably one of the most immature people you're likely to meet. I just put on a good show. That's why I'm so awesome and shit. Yeah, these two fingers, ladies.

I'm wading into the deep end here. And I want to go in several different directions right now, so rather than losing any more focus than I already have, I'm gona pull out. Yeah, I'm getting all rhythm method on yall. (Jesus, see what I mean?) I won't go into particulars just yet. But I will. Maybe even at length. We'll just have to see, now won't we?

Ah, the interweb. Not nature's suction cup, but certainly humanity's largest depository for angst.

And porn. Can't forget the porn.

It really is amazing, I shit you not.


At 8:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is what winter does to you... however, i have secrets to reveal to you that might help you a long the way.

P.S. that shit was awesome



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